Omg guys, I sick. I don’t think I’m gonna make it.
The Snowpocalypse has continued. Just when you think it’s all gonna melt, another dump of the white shit shows up. I figured I was pretty lucky not having to work during the week. I’d just ride it all out and come Friday, it’d be like nothing ever happened. Now, I’m not so sure if I’ll make it through the night…
The other day, after a “trip” back from the store for more staples (INCLUDING MILK!), I had a little umm, egg-cident? At first I thought it was nothing more than a couple of scrapes and bruises, but it feels more serious…
I finished a book in TWO days…with plenty of breaks in between for clicking my way around Netflix, making WAY too many visits to the cookie [spread] jar[s], and walking aimlessly from room to room, looking out the window, thinking that maybe if I just shake my head really really hard, it’ll all just disappear.
It hurts when I shrug my shoulders, or bend over, or sit down, or get up, or breathe…I think I’ve figured out a way to get around all of them but the last one, but I swear something’s gonna have to give soon, because the oxygen supply is diminishing.
I’m starting to see tiny snowpeople everywhere and these weird sounds keep echoing through the neighborhood. They kinda sounds like the laughter of little elves…no, demons…yeah, definitely demons, because I’m almost positive I saw one soaring down a hill the other day on an inner tube and c’mon, a snowy beach vacation? -> must be from hell.
And then yesterday, I finally made it out of the house again. I just knew I’d be able to turn things around because…THE GYM WAS OPEN! Sweat out the fever, get high off endorphins, have a good solid workout and start feeling like myself again. Only once I got there, I realized they were closing…in less than thirty minutes!
I tried to make the best use of my time, but after nearly a week out of the gym, there was some major gruntage going on. While I didn’t get the fever out, I did manage to sweat out a few of those cookies. I know I’m still sick though. Because later, in the eery silence of another snow-covered night, I did the un-think-able…
I FUCKING COOKED!!! 😯
Seriously guys. It’s been great knowing you. Tell my mother I love her. My dying wish is that you go forth, do not mourn my death, but celebrate my life. When you eat a pancake, think of me. Also, I’ve already chosen the person I’d like to give my eulogy…a woman who talks Pinterest, pumpkin, hashtags, and has a mouth like a sailor.
She may not KNOW me, but she basically IS me…reincarnated…before I’m actually dead…oh god, the fever spiking again! Before I get completely incoherent, I have to tell you, go find Spoons…
And run with them as loudly as possible?
Fuck it, I’m out.
Are you accident prone?
What’s the last hot meal you cooked?
Hahaha my husband teases me because I’m always finding random bruises on my legs from where I’ve run into things. I guess I’m sort of accident prone 😉 Last hot meal I cooked- parmesan couscous!
Ahhhhhhhhhhhhh! <- I'm sorry, I guess that's just the first time I've seen you write "my husband"!! Awwwwwr, congratulations sweetie!! I know I kinda fell off the blog-reading wagon around this time last year, so I've missed a lot...but I did just stalk your blog for about 20 minutes and you look so happy! Hope you two are doing great in that beautiful house of yours! 🙂
I’m not even joking — one of the main reasons I decided to buy a condo instead of a house was so that I wouldn’t have to shovel. We get TONNES of snow dumped on us every year, and the thought of constantly having to clear it myself was just too daunting. Condo and I don’t have to worry about it. Or grass Also… I forbid you to die before May. Forbid.
Hahaha! Noted: Be sure not to die at least until after May. 😉 I love you so much!
That chicken looks amazing! And I would cry if I got home and found my eggs looking like that – I eat so many eggs!!
Scotland this year is so strange, we have barely had any snow and that’s not like here at all! I am used to quite a battering of snow but other than a few flurries, nothing!
Then again there is still plenty of winter to go!! :-S
I’m always falling and hurting myself too. And lately I’ve been dropping everything! In just one week I’ve spilled my oatmeal, coffee, and hummus all over the floor on separate days. Oh, and sprayed soup all over my kitchen when I tried to puree in in the blender. Ugh.
That chicken looks amazing though! And the perfect meal for cold, snowy weather.
Oh man, I hate it when I have days or weeks like that! Kinda just wanna wrap myself in a bubble wrap suit and sit it out in a corner. haha!
I am so with you on how much snow needs to die right about meow. I volunteer it as tribute instead of you!!
Right meow! Hahaha, love it! Aww, I don’t want you to die either…I’m sure we can find some kind something that would make a better sacrifice. OHHH! How about my neighbor’s dog? Lol
You did NOT cook.
Okay, so you did. I used to claim not being accident prone but then wake up with bruising on my leg. Even though I love in a country without snow, I’m not a fan. This is the perfect time to vacay to Australia. Just saying.
Haha! Well it’ll be summer here soon…all the more reason to hurry up and get your booty to the US! 🙂
Pingback: My Favorite Cornbread Muffins |