Confessions of a Closet Narcissist

So yesterday…

Gym Selfie Yoga Pants

I went to the gym! πŸ˜€

For the first time in over a MONTH might I add, but that’s not the point…the POINT is that while AT the gym stretching before my workout, I looked over and saw this…

Gym Selfie Yoga Pants BootyHello, BOOTY! 😯

I then proceeded to take about five minutes to get a picture with the perfect arm placement, leg movement, and back arch needed to fully showcase this fun little find.

Later, I was walking on the treadmill, totally engrossed in my book, when one of my trainer friends (whom I know only from taking her Body Pump class) came up and said, “Hey girl! It’s good to see you again! Look at you, looking all skinny! I’m so jealous” to which I responded, “Ugh, not really…actually I’ve gained some weight…black is just my color.” *insert weak laugh here*

Um, WHY did I say that?! ESPECIALLY after hosting a freakin’ selfie photo shoot not ten minutes before that?!

After reading both Lindsay’s and Laura’s posts on giving and receiving compliments last week, I commented that I was better now about accepting compliments than I used to be because I know that when I compliment somebody, I truly mean it and I would hate someone to disregard a compliment from me. But while I was working out, I started thinking more and more about my sudden dismissive response…

Why do we find it hard to accept compliments these days? Is it because we live in a society where we put everyone’s needs before our own and it’s basically considered selfish to love ourselves? TheΒ definition of narcissism does not actually impart a negative connotation…that’s just something we’ve attached to it over the years.

So today, I say to hell with what’s right/wrong/culturally acceptable…I may not love every aspect of my body, but you know what? I may not have squats and dead lifts to thank, but I’m kinda lovin’ the junk I’ve recently acquired in ma’ trunk, AND a few other things as well!

I CONFESS that I love…

Selfie Julia Roberts Hair

My wild Julia Roberts-esque hair…

Now to figure out how to affix a fire-escape to the side of my one story house!

Selfie Dimples

My dimples…

Selfie Duck Face

My duck face full lips…

Selfie Eyes

My green eyes…which I’ve finally discovered how to magnify with purple eyeliner!

Note: I think I look a lot like my mama in this picture! πŸ˜‰

Selfie TJ Maxx

My shoulders and collar bones…

My boobs (sorry, no picture for that one) but hey, I was a late bloomer so those are TOTALLY going on the list! πŸ˜‰ And…

Gym Selfie

Did I mention my FINE derriere?

May I also confess that these are only HALF of the selfies I’ve taken over the last month…I cannot resist the urge to look at myself when I pass by reflective surfaces (windows, doors, mud puddles)…and mayyyyyybe the main reason I wear yoga pants around the man-friend so much is because I know that he likes them…like reeeeeeeeeeally likes them! πŸ˜‰

‘Fess up! What three things do you love about your body?

Do you find it hard to accept compliments? Why?

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82 Responses to Confessions of a Closet Narcissist

  1. You’re beautiful, Heather. And you do have a rather round derriere.

    I’m the same though, people say to me ‘Oh wow, you’ve lost much weight, you look great’. And my response? ‘I’m not quite there yet’ instead of ‘thank you’.

    • kissmybroccoli says:

      Haha! Thank you Nikki…and my bum says thank you too! πŸ˜‰

      And girl, you DO look great and you’ve worked HARD for it! Own it and say thank you! <3

  2. Right?! I have the same exact problem with accepting compliments… I blow them off and come up with excuses as to why they’re not true… Why? I almost want to say that it’s a subconscious attempt at getting the person to elaborate a bit more so that I know they’re being honest… Crazy talk. But you are looking gorgeous, and I’m not just saying that πŸ˜‰

    • kissmybroccoli says:

      Aww, thank you Amanda! And you know, I sorta get what you mean with the whole subconscious thing…I’ve done that before but usually only with family members. It’s like I’m fishing for more compliments…that I still won’t always accept! Ha!

  3. Lindsay says:

    preach it woman! and nice ass! yes, say thank YOU

    • kissmybroccoli says:

      Haha! Just want you to know I’m doing a little booty-shaking right now in your general diiiiiiirection! πŸ˜‰

  4. I can totally relate, especially when it comes to weight comments. If it’s a comment about something that I’m wearing, it seems that I’m more likely to accept it. However when it comes to my body or even my work, I tend to shrug it off. I’m going to take a cue from you and try to be more accepting. And by the way, you do have a lot of great features to embrace!

    • kissmybroccoli says:

      Thank you so much, Kim!! And I can totally relate to that…definitely easier to accept compliments on something that is based on our tastes/preferences instead of anything physical that might lead to any vulnerableness, but I’ve also realized that the more often you accept those compliments, the easier it gets! :)

  5. I LOVE YOU! And damn look at that booty! I’ll be honest, I’m a big fan of my booty as well :) It is weird that I also think I have great eyebrows??? Lol. For #3 does my sassitude count? Woo on getting back into the gym! Hoping my leg feels better this week and I can try out a new yoga class I’ve been wanting to go to. Happy Sunday Funday!

  6. Um, I want your butt.

    Seriously though, this is great. We all have things we love about ourselves, so we should OWN it, not just brush it off. Personally I love my arms, my skin that has thankfully never given me many problems, and my back.

    • kissmybroccoli says:

      Um, I want your skin…especially since for the last week, I’ve felt like I was starting puberty all over again! There…we’re even! Ha!

  7. Haha I’d be proud of that booty too! πŸ˜‰ I definitely know what you mean about accepting compliments – I always want to shrug them off or find a reason why what the person is saying isn’t true. Which is frustrating, because I know it’s annoying when I compliment someone and they respond that way. Maybe we all need to be a bit more narcissistic!

  8. gosh i love this post <3 and damn girl. i love you and your booty. nice work! and way to own it and be proud of it! i'm finding that i'm finally getting a booty too :) eddie keeps telling me he's so happy that i have an ass now hahaha i quite like the compliments and i am able to take them from him, but have to admit that i struggle taking them from others. three things i love about me is my new booty, my eyes, and my cheekbones

    • kissmybroccoli says:

      Aww, hon! I love that you two found each other! He seems so good for you…so grounding, supportive, and REAL! And yay for the new booty! Virtual hip bump in 3…2…1! πŸ˜‰

      xoxo

  9. Do me a favour and accept it :): you are totally gorgeous. And hello yes, Julia Roberts-esque hair.
    That being said I’m right there with you on having the hardest time accepting compliments of any kind. Not just related to my looks but everything I do or say, too. If somebody thanks me for something I did for them like my sister did earlier this week I’ll shrug it off saying anybody could have done it or criticize a detail I’m not totally happy with. In my opinion it’s once more our unachievable perfectionist ideas that keep us from being ‘okay’ with these compliments. Or actually not just okay but delighted with them. That and – as you pointed out – not wanting to seem narcissistic. Heck, I didn’t even tell people the [really good if I may say so – and that meant a lot to me as I was worried about passing it at all] grade I got for my Bachelor’s thesis because I was afraid of coming across cocky.
    Happy Sunday, Miss amazing booty :).

    • kissmybroccoli says:

      We are kindred spirits indeed, my dear! Quick…what am I thinking right now! I’ll give you a hint…it has something to do with Disney princess stickers I picked up at the store today! πŸ˜‰

      Congratulations on the thesis! Own that girl! I can’t even tell you how many times throughout high school and college, I lost sleep over a test/assignment only to pass it with flying colors and then try to let it just slide off my back like it was nothing (or even hide it from people because I was too afraid of them thinking I was trying to be a “smartie pants”). Insert eyeroll here!

  10. You DO have a fine ass! Can I borrow it for my competition? And that hair… I’m always jealous.

    Thanks for the shout, my friend. How cool to get a compliment from a trainer?! You should be proud.

    I like my boobs. I was a late bloomer too. LOL!

  11. Words cannot even express how proud I am of you for writing this post. I had a huge grin on my face reading this because it is all about focusing on your best attributes. Nobody is perfect so embrace what you love.
    Your booty is FFFFIIIINNNEEE! Whistle, whistle, cat call.

    By the way, I know this isn’t your typical WIR post, but I want you to link it up tomorrow because it’s one of my favorite lists of all time. The list of things you love about yourself. It doesn’t get much better than that.

  12. We are our toughest critics and I honestly think as women we will ALWAYS find faults. I blame society. One thing I am really trying to work on is embracing those faults and learn to not look at them as flaws, but just who I am. And I should love that regardless. I have a hard time taking compliments too, but am starting to learn if others don’t see all the flaws I see, well maybe they really just aren’t there.

    You are so beautiful lady, inside and out, and honestly, I think the inside matters more and is more important anyways. Who want’s to be a gorgeous model, but be heartless and not likeable? Not me. LOVE YOU.

    • kissmybroccoli says:

      “but am starting to learn if others don’t see all the flaws I see, well maybe they really just aren’t there.” < - Love this!! And I couldn't agree MORE on the heartless model thing...it doesn't matter how many "friends" you have or what kind of title you have, you can only be as happy in life as you are with yourself! :)

      Love YOU!! xoxo

  13. I LOVED Lindsay’s post earlier this week! And I think you look great! My curves have filled out a LOT lately and I without a doubt know it’s becuase I’ve put working out on the back burner… Not to say that I’m not as thoughtful about my health, but the past few moths I’ve been focusing my thoughts elsewhere. I’m looking forward to getting back into running this week!

    • kissmybroccoli says:

      Thank you, Allison! And you know, life is all about cycles and ups and downs…but in the end, everything has a way of balancing out! I’m so happy to hear you’re getting back into running, but just make sure you’re doing it for YOU! :)

  14. Shannon says:

    Such a great post, I can relate to it! Even the julia roberts hair (aka, no gel/air dry hair day) and green eyes (just discovered violet eyeshadow does wonders..literally last week) I always brush off compliments mainly because I never believe people mean them and they are just being nice. I’ve learned that as long as I am happy with how I look I really stopped caring about what everyone says – even if it’s a compliment. So do what you’re doing, it’s obviously woking wonders! Flaunt that booty!

    • kissmybroccoli says:

      Aww, thank you, Shannon! Life definitely has new meaning when you’re not constantly wondering what other people think, isn’t it? I think I’m finally getting to that point after years and years of trying to people-please. Now give me a good ginger twin booty bump! πŸ˜‰

  15. Geez, I freaking LOVE every single thing about this post. Work dat booty girrrrl, work it. Back that shit UP.

    It can be really, really hard to not only accept, but actually believe the compliments we get. I’m always paranoid that people are doing the Mean Girls compliment thing (“omg, I love your skirt, where did you get it?” –> “that is the ugliest effing skirt I have ever seen.”)

    For the record, you are really, really, incredibly stunning.

    Okay, three things I like about myself… My “dΓ©colletage” (i.e., boobs + collar bones + shoulders), my cheekbones, and my boootay.

    • kissmybroccoli says:

      Well, for the record, that really, really means a lot to me since I think you are a total babe! I mean seriously…if I ever decide to swing that way, Jake better WATCH OUT! 😯

  16. Lisa says:

    You’re gorgeous! Your booty is awesome! :-) My husband loves when I wear yoga pants too.

    • kissmybroccoli says:

      Thank you, Lisa! And seriously, I think we should all get on the yoga pants train! I put on jeans for the first time in weeks the other day and ended up changing into leggings…aka the more “stylish” version of yoga pants…or what I try to tell myself anyway! πŸ˜‰

  17. It’s not so difficult, believe me. Ok, let’s practise: ‘I think you’re lips are beautiful kissing lips! Lucky man-friend!’ Say thank you.
    ‘Nice Bootey Babe and that badass look with it?? You rock it .’ Say thank you.
    ‘I looove your hair!! Perfect match with the green eyes. Beauty. ‘ Say thank you.
    Easy, right?? And I meant EVERYTHING I just wrote!!
    But yes, I had hard times too taking compliments, but no more. And I love even more to GIVE compliments!!

    • kissmybroccoli says:

      Thank you…thank you…thank YOU!! Oh Lucie, I love you so much! And just since you failed to list your three things, I’m going to give them to you…I love your gorgeous hair, your radiant smile, and your toned tummy! …say thank you! πŸ˜‰

  18. Yes! I am the worst at taking compliments! I just laugh it off and make it really awkward. I love this post in every way shape and form…pun intended πŸ˜‰ haha Happy Sunday my beautiful blend!

  19. Yes compliments are definitely tough to take sometimes! It is so true about being dismissive about them. Especially when it is another female complimenting you and particular when it is on your body not just say an item of clothing your wearing.

    I like my legs, my arms and my hair (that’s a body part right?)

    • kissmybroccoli says:

      I know, right? Why does it seem so much harder to take a compliment from a woman as opposed to a man? I still can’t figure that one out!

  20. If it was another blogger, I might have felt awkward commenting on a post centralised around a booty but its the broccoli- no holds barred πŸ˜‰

    Its great to see you appreciate all these things about yourself and your body- it often is hard to accept compliments verbally, but as long as on the inside there is something sparked- then hey, its something.

    I’m pretty bottom heavy and used to think I had tree trunk legs and calves- but dammit, I can out squat my mates who are twice my height and weight. πŸ˜‰

    • kissmybroccoli says:

      That’s awesome, Arman! I’ve always wished my legs could be a bit more muscular…but even when they’re strong from working out consistently (which hopefully I will one day happen again!), they still look like chicken legs! Ha!

  21. Love this post! It’s so lame how hard it is to accept complimentsβ€”I have always struggled with this. I’ve had to train myself to say, “Thank you” instead of, like, “Actually…”

    And yes, I’ve always been thankful for having an ass and hipsβ€”as a petite gal, it’s what keeps me from looking like a little girl! I also love that I got blue eyes from my mom’s side of the family.

  22. Loving all the selfies ;). And isn’t it lovely when you don’t pay attention to all of your parts and then BAM, a booty comes out of nowhere? Amazing! And I totally agree.. I find it hard to accept compliments sometimes. Especially when I am gross and sweaty at the gym and NOT feeling so hot.

  23. Angela says:

    You actually remind me of Uma Thurman!

  24. Brittany says:

    Girrrrll, you are GORGEOUS!! I am loving the booty shots, embrace it! I am awful at accepting compliments, I really need to work on that! Love this post.

    • kissmybroccoli says:

      Aww, thanks Britt! But honestly, I can’t see why in the heck you’re bad at accepting compliments…you are a TOTAL babe! Like for serious! πŸ˜‰

  25. I love this post! You look damn good girl!! I am envious, & that is one marvelous booty! My husband always says he loves my booty, so I guess that’s one thing I do like about myself. I also like my eyes, shoulders, & biceps. :)

  26. Heather, you look AMAZING! Rock that booty, I say!

    What do I love about my body? Hmm – my blue, massive eyes (one of the things Jesse was attracted to as he thinks my eyes are way bigger than American girls haha), my toned stomach and I love that my hair is nice naturally – no hair straightener for me!!! And I may have nothing in the boob department but at least I don’t have to worry about sleeping on my stomach and being uncomfortable or always having to wear a bra haha

    I’m another one who doesn’t take compliments well – I just get super awkward – though on our wedding day, I KNEW I looked good which was a total first!

    • kissmybroccoli says:

      Kristy!! Oh my gosh, I’ve gotten so behind! I didn’t even realize that I’d missed your wedding! Congratulations you gorgeous, blue-eyed doll! Ahhh, I’m off to check for pictures!! πŸ˜€

  27. Khushboo says:

    You’re sexy and you knowwww it (sing it in the Pitbull tune) ;)! Honestly though Heather, you are looking great and I love that you are embracing all your ass-ets…my pancake booty could use some more junk in its trunk! Jokes aside, this post is such a powerful reminder to own what you got..I know it’s something many of us need to work on!

    • kissmybroccoli says:

      “Ass-ets” <- Ha! Love it! Thank you so much, Khusboo! And now I'm craving pancakes at 3am! Thanks! πŸ˜‰

  28. Lena says:

    Heya ms Julia Roberts esque beauty πŸ˜‰ you are pretty dam fine girl- rock on. I find it nice to get compliments I usually just say thank you. I actually think its because I’m so not confiendent if that makes sense so it’s just so lovely when anyone notices me at all :) Now since we are being all narcissitic- may I ask when you “bloomed” ahem sorry- I still haven’t and I’m bloody 20! I know it’s my body type (hence the note of anyone noticing me being lovely) but give me hope! It’s ok if you can’t- I can live with it- better to move on Quickly I think lol xo

    • kissmybroccoli says:

      Awww, haha! Believe it or not, I didn’t FULLY blossom until college! Actually, I think I WAS twenty! I kid you not, I was shopping at Victoria Secret with one of my best friends and I shouted over the dressing room wall, “Omg Jill, I’ve got BOOBS!!” And LUCKILY, even when I’ve lost weight, I’ve never lost in my chest…just my rear! Haha! So see? You’ve totally got hope! πŸ˜‰

  29. This is SO AWESOME. I love this post, Heather! You’re rocking it :) And honestly, the two biggest things that have helped my self esteem in the past year are my boyfriend (duh, he’s so sweet!) and the blog world! I LOVE seeing other people rocking it and accepting their body. I’ve FINALLY come to realize that I’m never going to be the skinny-athletic type, but I can rock these curves! πŸ˜‰

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  31. Hahaha! Ah, I’m so not good at accepting those compliments either. Us gals can be pretty hard headed eh?

    And now, I shall sing sir. mixalot for the rest of the day – just for you bootylicious ginger!

    • kissmybroccoli says:

      Right? And I find it’s easier to accept a compliment from a man than a woman…which is weird, because AS a woman, I know I don’t shell out compliments for no good reason…I’m a picky biotch! πŸ˜‰

      And now I’M gonna have that song in my head for the rest of the night! Thanks!

  32. im AWFUL at accepting compliments.. my new years resolution was to actually accept compliments without feeling the urge to negate that compliment. I struggle with it still.

    butttt.. I love my backside (19 years of catching did it some good :) ), my lips, and eyes..

  33. calee says:

    Love this post! I basically only wear purple-toned eyeshadows for that same reason.

    I love my back, my shoulders and collarbones, my lips, my hair (even though most of the time I pretend to hate it β€” only when it’s being a pain in the ass, which is a lot lately).

    • kissmybroccoli says:

      Nice! I can’t believe it took me 28 years to discover this makeup miracle! Ha! And I just have to share something with you…I have that pic of you, me, and Sarah at Blend as my wallpaper. Well, I had my laptop open at work the other day and one of the male nurses came in and was like, who’s the babe on the left? That would be YOU, Miss Hottie! πŸ˜‰

      • calee says:

        my only comment to that is this: “Is he hot?”

        PS this is where I’d leave a rant about how we still live in a society where we have to say “male nurse” because it’s a) assumed that all nurses are female, and b) assumed that I’m straight. But, you’re not the person I need to rant about that to, especially given you KNOW the truth behind both these things. Just thought I’d provide some food for thought!

        • kissmybroccoli says:

          Wow…very true…I didn’t even think about that!

          And yeah, he’s hot…if you squint a little! Ha! πŸ˜‰

  34. Mom says:

    You DO look like me in that pic!!! That’s the first thing I thought when I saw you!!! I love the way you look from the top of your beautiful head of hair to the bottoms of your cute little toes!!! Don’t forget, you look exactly the way I ordered you before you were even born…while still in my tummy! Blond hair, green eyes and dimples.
    By the way, next time you get a compliment…don’t think…just say “thank you”. People don’t compliment you unless you really look pleasing to THEM!!! Have you ever heard anyone say…”gawd, you look ugly today”!!!!
    I love you, my precious, beautifully made daughter!

    • kissmybroccoli says:

      Oh mama!! I was hoping you’d see this! But now…ugh, you’re making me cry and laugh at the same time! Yeah, I guess I’ve never heard anyone say that before! Lol! Aww, now I’m missing you like crazy! We need to get together soon and have a mama-daughter day…and book your MASSAGE…I know you could use it! :)

  35. Love all the compliment love lately! I have a HUGE problem with taking compliments, and I always ward them off with putting myself down. Or even items I buy and people ask about, I have this NEED to be like “oh it was on sale so … ya know… ” um, why?? I catch myself doing it and think to myself “you know, people would be a LOT happier giving you a compliment if you’d take it and be happy.” So I’m going to work on it.

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  39. Hey girl! Just discovered your blog through Meg…and loving it! This is a fabulous post because 1) People need to learn to appreciate what they’ve got and not be ashamed of liking themselves! And 2) You’re stunning, and that badonkadonk! (Is it weird for me to say you look like a hybrid of Kirstie Alley- in her prime- and Angelina Jolie?)

    Anyway, great stuff, and looking forward to following along with your blog!

    • kissmybroccoli says:

      Thank you so much, Dominique! I’m so glad you liked this post! And wow, YES it is completely alright for you to say that…ha! I have to admit I’m feeling pretty darn good right about now! Thank you!! πŸ˜€

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  41. I don’t really know why it’s hard to take compliments…maybe because a lot of times we don’t believe them? Who knows but you look great and always do, girlie!! <3

    • kissmybroccoli says:

      Aww, thank you SO much Amanda! See? I’ve been working on this whole “learn to take a compliment” thing! πŸ˜€

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