As of riiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiight now…no, wait…NOW!

I am a FREEEEEEEEEE woman!

I have just finished working 3,180 minutes in the last five days. For all you mathematically challenged folks out there, that would be 53 hours. I have the next four and a HALF days off and I have absolutely nothing to do…no plans, no chores, NOTHING!

Now normally, working 10-11 hour shifts five days in a row would leave me with a mountain of laundry, dirty dishes, and an empty fridge, but not this time! While my fridge may still be more populated by condiments (and wine) than actual FOOD, you and I both know I could live for years out of my pantry…and really, I’ve been living off of cereal lately anyhow. But no, what I’m really yammering on about is the fact that I was able to knock out ALL of my chores, hit up TWO grocery stores, ran to Target, bought a step-ladder, found a dead mouse, AND still managed to get a solid EIGHT HOURS OF SLEEP every night day!

Oh wait, what was that about the dead mouse…? 😯

Long story short, many many months ago, the light in my pantry quit working. It’s the kind of attic-type light with a pulley down chain thingy (I told you to call me Super Woman, not an electrician). It felt like something was wrong/caught in the chain, but since I still have no kitchen table (with chairs that I could climb up on), I had no way to get up there. So I came home the other day with my little step-ladder ready to do a little DIY-ing…

I removed the bulb, unscrewed the fixture from the ceiling, and reached up
WITH MY BARE HANDS to find…

Uhhhh…yeah!

Remember when I had problems with mice last winter? Well, after I had the pest control people come out, I haven’t had any problems. I guess this poor little loser got lost on the way out…and got electrocuted in the process. 😯

Now, while I’d LOVE to say I put on my big girl pants and did what needed to be done, in actuality, I screamed a lot, washed my hands five times, ran around the house repeating, “oh ma god, oh ma god, oh ma gahhhhhhhd!” Then I proceeded to Snapchat it to everyone I know, call my dad, and whine/text to my sister…who I will confess actually had to be the one to get rid of the little vermin.

Yaaaaahuuuuuflabbalaaaagahhhhuhhhhh!

But back to MY super human abilities! Because while Tori does deserve a medal for sister of the year, I’d like to see her…

Wash AND FOLD two never-ending loads of laundry.
Empty the dishwasher AND reload it.
Sweep the kitchen.
Clean the ENTIRE bathroom including the shower of doom.
And STILL have time to…

Spend 15 minutes picking out one freakin’ carton of milk…

For an experiment that will later be revealed.

Hunt down ALL THE FALL THINGS at Target

“My precious”

And collect eight cans of her favorite Pringles all for a BUCKeach.

While also catching up on emails.
Responding to blog comments from the last 3 weeks (whoops!).
Painting her nails.
AND scheduling a massage for this coming Saturday!

And that, my friends, is why I get the cape! 😀

But I could never claim to conquer all my feats with a scrub brush and a debit card alone. Oh no…I have to take a minute to thank my faithful sidekicks…

Who have asked to be referred to as the Pink Ladies!

In yo’ FACE, insomnia!

And now, to enjoy my four and a half day weekend! 😀

What has been your super power this week?

If you could have any super power in the world, what would it be?