Thoughts on Feeling Guilty

When I say “bad” foods,

What are the first things to come to your mind?

Are there any foods you restrict solely because you feel you lack the willpower needed to stop eating once you start?

If you DO allow yourself to have that food and you DO overeat,
how do you react?

Do you box up the culprit and hide it away somewhere?

Do you swear to have more self-control next time?

Guilty Me

Do you feel…guilty?

We all have them…foods we don’t necessarily trust ourselves with.Β I, for one, have a lot of them: cereal, granola, cookies, hummus, crackers, nut butter, pretzels…


Basically, anything I have ever referred to as “crack” here on the blog!

On the surface, it may seem like just another joke, but deep down, I really have a problem when faced with certain foods. And it’s something I’ve been working on since I committed to becoming an intuitive eater. In the past, I have restricted these foods…they’ve been hidden, thrown in the trash, and well, I already confessed the pre-meditated murder of
Mr. Sweet Potato Butter.Β πŸ˜‰

But the more I denied the food, the more novelty it gained.Β So, whenever I DID allow myself to have the item, it was like,

“Aww, hell…GAME ON!!”

Crumbs on my face, a tummy ache, and one guilty Heather later…
I was right back where I started. πŸ™

A lot of you have mentioned/joked/honestly confessed that you believe if you began a journey in intuitive eating, “essentially” eating whatever you want whenever you want it, that you would basically binge on all of your “bad” foods.

Well, I came up with a solution to that problem!

Enter “CRACK” pretzels stage right:

Pretzel Oats

Enjoy those “forbidden” foods in smaller portions….

Peanut Flour Smoothie

Incorporate them into meals where they’re flavor is highlighted but not the
star of the show….


Savor each and every bite…

Arctic Zero

Until one day, you realize it is JUST another food and has absolutely NO POWER
over you!

And if, say, three weeks into your intuitive eating journey, you are surprised with a gift of a different brand of “crack” from a certain beautiful blonde Swiss and then proceed to KILL a quarter of the jar in less than a day…

Pretzels & OvomaltineJust stop, take a deep breath, and remember this:

We are human.

We make mistakes.

You’re still learning.

And today is a NEW day!

If you want to feel guilty, feel guilty about not calling your mom today…about forgetting your friend’s birthday…about not taking the time to stop and smell the roses…but do NOT waste your time feeling guilty about food.

Actually, wait…don’t feel guilty about ANY of that!

Call your mom right now…buy a BELATED birthday card (and a bottle of wine…boozed up friends are quicker to forgive)…and bury your nose so deep in that rose you end up snorting a ladybug! πŸ˜‰

Because life is just too damn short for guilt…


Special thanks to Meg, Melissa, Ashley, and my IE Coach,Β Jamie for reminding me that guilt is a wasted emotion based on judgement of ourselves and judgement does not serve us in any positive way WHATSOEVER!

What are some of your “bad” foods?

What guilt will you throw away today to free your time for more positive self-loving thoughts?

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89 Responses to Thoughts on Feeling Guilty

  1. Cake, red wine, chocolate, biscuits, CHEESE! You name it.

    Love once again how honest and open you are being with your journey as I feel like I’d go through the same thing if I did IE too.

    • kissmybroccoli says:

      Aww, thank you Jan! I’m doing my best to share as I go…I really want to help others see that there is no way to go about this perfectly. Plus, I could use the reminder myself sometimes! πŸ™‚

  2. Oh my Gosh, how I LOOOOVE this post!! You are so brave girl….I can definitely relate and I have all these habits of not buying ‘bad’ foods, hiding them….and then I am all over it. I started to re-include them in my diet, not to forbid my anything so it loses to be so tempting. Everything what is forbidden we just want more, right? I do feel guilty yes, but I do much better because I feel guilty for 30 minutes while I felt guilty for 3 days in the past. Progress in baby steps – right? What you say at the end is SO true – we are humans and not perfect AND life is too short!!
    Love you girl and I hope I did not throw you in the guilt jar with my parcel!

    • kissmybroccoli says:

      Yes, it’s ALL about the baby steps! The point of it all is that it IS progress and not a never-ending cycle of binge-guilt-restrict! And no! Don’t feel bad at all…I LOVE the Ovomaltine…I just need to realize that just because it’s a special treat, doesn’t mean I have to go crazy and eat the entire jar at once! Plus, I’m sure if I REALLY wanted, a certain someone could always send me another! πŸ˜‰

      And speaking of…I have your package almost ready! Just gotta work on getting it all to fit in the box! Lol xoxox

  3. katie says:

    Just LOVE you! I used to have that “guilty” feeling about foods too, it was something I struggled with for a while. My struggle with HA really helped me overcome that and get healthy again, feeling guilty about food is NOT healthy at all.

    I believe we all at some point have an unhealthy relationship with food, due to so many things, but we can overcome it. I am so glad I did overcome and now I am pregnant with a baby boy because of it and I honestly have never LOVED my body so much or my relationship with it now.

    Food is the last thing we should feel guilty about, other things like you mentioned are things we should be.

    Love you!

    What is that snack that looks like pb with the pretzels in one of the first pics?!!

    • kissmybroccoli says:

      Aww, girlie, this makes me so happy! I can “hear” the joy in each and every one of your words! I’m working on getting to the point where you are…where not only is my relationship with food balanced and healthy, but also that I can actually learn to love my body again!

      That is actually a bowl of oats mixed with peanut flour, topped with banana, pretzels, and peach jam and it was DELICIOUS! πŸ˜€

  4. LOVE this!!! I just kept nodding my head while reading this, like “yes, yes, yes.” A lot of your “crack” foods are mine, too. I really really need to finish the Intuitive Eating book, but i lost my kindle… hah.

    • kissmybroccoli says:

      You LOST YOUR KINDLE?!?! Oh no!! I hope it turns up soon sweetie!

      And the head nodding…yeah, that is totally me with the IE book! I was reading a couple of pages last night and was like “whoa! how did they know?!” Haha!

  5. Elise says:

    First of all thank you SO MUCH for posting this. I can’t tell you how much I relate to this. I am exactly like this, EXACTLY. I tend to have these foods that I don’t let myself eat or eat very rarely, at best, and when I finally allow myself to have them, I overindulge and eat way too much (or way more than a normal person would have) and then I am laced with feelings of guilt and shame for my “lack of self-control”. I am truly inspired and motivated by your recommendation to allow yourself to have those “bad” foods, just in smaller portions. By making it a food that is OK, it takes away the idea that it’s bad or taboo. Realizing I can have those foods, a little today, a little tomorrow, a little the next day, instead of eating a crapload in one sitting can help me regain control while still enjoying the foods I love. Thank you so much for this post! It means so much to me!!

    • kissmybroccoli says:

      You are SO welcome Elise! Oh my gosh, it just makes me SO incredibly happy to hear that this has helped you see things a little differently. It is SO true though…once a food loses the novelty aspect or if your body get’s “used” to having it over and over again (called habituation)…we actually grow tired of it. Not necessarily in a way where we are sick of it…that’s not the point, but that we appreciate it as just another food…just another choice on the shelf…not the GRAND PRIZE! πŸ™‚

  6. Lee says:

    I struggle with this a lot. I have issues with cereal, ice cream, chips, mostly things that I can have just a little bit more of. Because a little bit more always turns into the whole container and then I feel guilty.

    • kissmybroccoli says:

      Oh yeah…same here! And bite-sized things are the hardest for me because it doesn’t LOOK like I’m eating much…my brain is like, “C’mon, that was just a tease!” I think what really helps is to incorporate foods like that into a meal. Put them on a plate. Appease all of your senses, not just your taste buds. Does that make sense?

  7. Rebecca says:

    Thank you for this post!

  8. When you said “bad” foods I thought white potatoes. Because I hate potatoes. LOL!

    Sweet potato butter reminds me – I saw sweet potato and caramelized onion mustard at Whole Paycheck this weekend! I was going to buy it but I was trying to be responsible with money. Silly me. Going back for it this weekend.

    • kissmybroccoli says:

      Omg, are you CRAZY?! How could you turn away from that?! You BETTER have gone back for it…and I BETTER be getting a full report on it soon! πŸ˜€

      Mmmm, I’d dip some WHITE POTATO French fries in that shiz! πŸ˜‰

  9. If you haven’t already, check out Katie’s blog : Peace, Love, & Oats. She has recently started an intuitive eating journey as well. I’m sure you guys could share your journeys together!

  10. I. get. you. I always have this problem when eating out! Especially with the bread basket… But step by step I guess!

  11. Thank you for this post! I recently threw out a half eaten jar of sunflower butter because I thought I didn’t have the self control to keep my serving portions down πŸ™ It’s nice to know that everyone faces this same problem too.

    • kissmybroccoli says:

      Oh honey, no…you are SO not alone! But just know that until you teach yourself how to trust yourself, that sunbutter will always win no matter what. Baby steps. Patience. Forgiveness. Growth….*Hugs*! πŸ™‚

  12. One thing I learned and glad you are learning it as well. There is no “good” food or “bad” food. Food is just food. Our bodies don’t know the difference but our eating disorders glorify food and give it way more attention than it deserves. If you actually do intuitively eat you will eat WHATEVER you want and stop when you are satisfied. I think restricting and eating low calorie, empty, non nutritious foods that our eating disorders tell us we “want” it why some people binge. Of course they’re still hungry, they cut calories every which way they could when their body wanted something of substance.

    And if you do “over eat” one day. It’s ONE day and your body is not going to change over night. Just accept it and move on to your next day. Food should have no power over you! Glad you’re finding that out! So proud of you!

    Love you!!

    • kissmybroccoli says:

      Right on Debbie! I swear sometimes we must think our bodies are pretty darn stupid…you can’t “fool” them with fillers…they want what they want…and if you don’t give it to them, it’s only a matter of time before the rebellion!

      Thank you so much for all the support, love! I am SO proud of you and how your relationship with food has grown…definitely an inspiration! xoxo

      Love you MORE! πŸ™‚

  13. krista says:

    Thanks for posting this! It really does not get the attention it deserves.
    It’s so sad to me that I feel I can only buy individually pre-portioned foods or else I’ll eat the whole effing bag.. but working on it! πŸ™‚ No one is perfect, I think the key is to just not beat yourself up about it. The more upset you get over a slip, the worse it gets.

    • kissmybroccoli says:

      So true! No one is perfect…and big changes like this don’t happen overnight. Trust is one of the hardest things to build back after it is lost and I think it’s only harder when it’s yourself whom you can’t trust! It’s ALL about the baby steps and accepting the fact that it’s ok to falter.

  14. LOVE this Heather! I’ve given up a lot of my guilty feelings over eating in the past few years but some still remain. Often times I’ll still feel guilty after eating something that I normally don’t like cookies or chocolate but I’ve learned that like you said, we’re human and we make mistakes. Plus… I could be doing a lot worse so I always remember that a little mistake won’t kill me. AND that it’s okay to enjoy something you enjoy from time to time in moderation πŸ™‚

  15. I try not to limit myself, but I do feel guilty if I just had a great workout then eat everything in sight. Bad foods for me are cocoa nut butters — I can’t resist eating a spoonful (all the time!)

  16. So true! Thanks for this post. I have been off dairy for 2 weeks (doctor’s orders)…but I would do cartwheels for chocolate ice what do I do? Nutella sandwich. Ah! πŸ™‚

  17. Woah what the heck is that Ovomaltine butter, it looks like Nutella!? DO TELL! Anyway yes, nut butters seems to be like that for me, especially since they are so high calorie in such a small portion.. it’s hard to keep to that portion, although I have been doing a lot better πŸ™‚ I definitely agree though, it’s all about taking back the “crack” and leaving it with no emotional value, it’s just another food, not a secretive drug of choice.

    • kissmybroccoli says:

      “…it’s just another food, not a secretive drug of choice.” <- AMEN! And the best part about finally reaching the point of "intuitive eater" is that you don't NEED to think of portion sizes...because you will be able to trust yourself to stop eating once you've had enough no matter what. Omg, it is SO much better than Nutella, or Justin's, or Peanut Butter & Company! It's chocolate spread with little crunchy bits mixed in cookie crumbs or something! I have absolutely NO idea what's in it though because the entire label is in another language! Lol Definitely a big step for me though, since I never would have touched the stuff while calorie counting...I would have had to know EVERYTHING that was in it!

  18. Love this. Love you. Love your advice. My goodness, lady… all of your IE posts have been blowing me out of the water lately. I love how you admit that it’s not all sunshine and rainbows and that you do make mistakes along the way. I remember craving the foods that I restricted like CRAZY when I first started allowing myself to eat them again, and being terrified that I would lose control and overeat. Yes, there were a lot of instances where I probably overdid it a little bit and I definitely beat myself up over those, but if there’s one thing I learned it’s that it’s important to just let that go and NOT go back to restricting because it’ll just start the cycle all over again. I’m happy to say that food is food these days. I eat a carrot. I eat a cupcake. I move on. There are more important things in life… like making sure I DO call my mom and DON’T forget about her birthday tomorrow!

    • kissmybroccoli says:

      “…it’s important to just let that go and NOT go back to restricting because it’ll just start the cycle all over again” <- Omg, YES!! The never-ending will never end if we don't learn to forgive ourselves!

  19. monica says:

    I’m really proud and I really look up to you for posting this πŸ™‚ I have the exact same issue and it’s very hard to overcome, but you’re very inspirational to us all. Thanks, Heather!

  20. I love everything about this post! my favorite thing to do is incorporate things I love into other random meals. I crumbled a cookie in my oatmeal. what up.

    • kissmybroccoli says:

      YES!!! I used to do the same thing with the gluten-free cookies I’d buy from the farmer’s market over the summer…either add them to oats or mix them with my yogurt! It balances out the sweet so it’s not a complete sugar high and I get a little extra nutrition in there too! πŸ˜€

  21. Lyric says:

    I love this post. So many great concepts all smooshed into one! I’m still struggling with guilty thoughts (Especially because its easter and one to many chocolates may have made it into my mouth) but all things take time! Thank you for this post:)

    • kissmybroccoli says:

      You’re welcome, Lyric! I hope it helps to remind you not to be so hard on yourself. It’s ok to indulge sometimes…it’s completely NORMAL! But it’s when you take that indulgence and put it on a pedestal…where it becomes a SUPER (crack) food…that it becomes a problem. It’s a hard lesson to learn, and it takes a lot of time before you can really feel like you’ve got the hang of it (I still don’t), but in my mind, it’s one of the most important concepts in intuitive eating. It’s all about trust and forgiveness.

  22. Tonia says:

    Awesome post today. Thank you!!!!!!!!

  23. Awesome post! We waste way too much time feeling guilty about things we cannot change, it’s not worth it! I overate by a LOT over Easter weekend & made huge strides with not feeling “guilty” on Monday, rather I focussed on how much better eating “healthy” would make me feel. It helped a ton πŸ™‚

    • kissmybroccoli says:

      Thank you, Katie! And really…isn’t it amazing how our bodies strive for balance? I mean, most of the time after a stent of overeating/overindulgence, we will naturally start to crave “healthier” foods like fruits and veggies! Just goes to show that our bodies do just fine on their own…they don’t need us to think for them! πŸ™‚

  24. Its weird how everyone has their own different “crack” isnt it..mines anything sweet; savoury stuff I can leave..crisps, pretzels, cheese..really not bothered about any of them! For me its all about chocolate, ice cream & cake..generally once I start I cant stop so its definitely a case for me of working them slowly in as small portions rather than being like a shark on a feeding frenzy!!
    That feeling of guilt & tummy ache is horrible though!

    • kissmybroccoli says:

      A shark on a feeding frenzy! Yes, that is the PERFECT way to explain it! My biggest thing is the mixture of sweet and salty…that’s really what got me the most with the pretzels. They’re cinnamon flavored with just a bit of salt to them!

      And yeah, if the guilt wasn’t enough, the tummy ache just makes it worse! Gotta give it ALL up! No more guilt!!

  25. It’s funny, I hadn’t thought about the idea of good and bad foods in a while. And honestly, I eat a lot of the foods I considered “bad” before on a daily basis now- like fats in general. There was a point where 90% of food was off limits, and I couldn’t’ control myself around the “bad” stuff, and often I would Bing (although rarely going over my “calorie limit”). I did read I.E. a couple years ago when ealry in recovery and reflecting back, I think I really do eat mostly intuitively now. Most of the time I want to eat delicious healthy food, and because my body is fed with protein carbs and fat, it doesn’t feel the need to dive into all the food and finish it all. I don’t consider any food bad anymore and I don’t restrict. I don’t feel like I have to. It’s like holding sand in your hand, the tighter you grip your diet, the harder it is to hold on to (eating a healthy and balanced diet). I no longer have food guilt. Heck, I’m eating out of a peanut butter jar right now. πŸ˜€ Who am I? I’m so happy you were able to recognize these unhealthy habits before they became too dangerous. Congrats on admitting it to yourself (and being honest on the blog) and being responsible enough to do something about it. I think that opening up helps you to feel accountable when everyone is rooting for you to be healthy. πŸ™‚ <3

    • kissmybroccoli says:

      “It’s like holding sand in your hand, the tighter you grip your diet, the harder it is to hold on to.” <- Wow!! Just WOW!! Thank you SO much for this, Cassie! Not only does it help me to see that I'm on the right path, but it gives me even MORE motivation/inspiration to keep going! I am so proud of you and admire the relationship you now have with food. Definitely where I want to be someday! Thank you, thank you, THANK YOU!!

  26. I just love how you ended this post . . . by looking at the big picture. Maybe we should be focusing our efforts on being a better person, loving and connecting with the people that are important in our lives. Feeling guilty about food is not worth it! Instead, learn and adjust. πŸ™‚

  27. Madi says:

    *standing ovation* how do you do this “I’m going to write something really deep and insightful, but still keep it light and relatable” thing all the time? it’s seriously impressive. I am le jealous.

    • kissmybroccoli says:

      Haha! Thank you Madi! Honestly, this is just how I deal with stuff…I have to have a little humor mixed in there to break stuff up…otherwise I’ll just end up rolling around in a puddle of self pity <- the really stinky kind! How's that for metaphors/imagery? Guilt as poop! πŸ˜‰

  28. Love this Heather! I remember when I started to re-introduce foods I restricted, I was terrified of them because I thought I would go overboard when I first started eating them again. And once in a while, I did. But eventually, my body figured out that I could have it whenever I wanted, so I no longer felt the need the go nuts on it every time. If I want it, I eat it, and then I move on.

    So happy to see that you’re making progress!

  29. I swear Heather, we’re on the same “spiritual journey” with food πŸ™‚ Since Christmas, I have completely cut out processed foods from my diet. And sometimes every day is a new struggle: the people I work with CONSTANTLY bring in sweets. But, after going through my own stage of denial/binge last year, I think I’ve hit my sweet spot using the following techniques:
    -Really thinking about a treat before I nom it down. Will this really satisfy my craving? Or just leave me wanting more?
    -Thinking “I don’t eat this stuff” rather than “I can’t eat this stuff.” This has helped me a ton with the processed foods. Idk, it adds an empowering aspect to it.
    -Recognizing my trigger foods and knowing how to enjoy them a bit everyday so I don’t overdo it later. This has been a HUGE development for me! I used to ban foods such as PB and bread and chocolate for fear of overdoing it. Now, I incorporate them into my daily eats. I have a tablespoon of PB in my oats in the morning, a melted square of dark chocolate in evening oats (yes, that’s my “dessert” haha), and a sandwich with delicious bread in the afternoon.

    Bottom line: You and me are foodie sisters πŸ˜‰ And we’ll get to our happy place eventually πŸ™‚

    • kissmybroccoli says:

      Good for you, Aly!! It’s amazing how much a change of perspective can do for us, isn’t it? Choosing to not eat foods because they don’t enrich our lives/make us happy versus thinking of them as “forbidden” is a HUGE step in the journey to build up a healthy relationship with food. I’m glad to hear that you’ve learned to accept your previous trigger foods as just another choice instead of keeping them up on a pedestal where they only get more alluring day by day, minute by minute. And in the end, it ALL comes down to giving your body what it craves…it not only makes us happy, but at the same time reinforces a positive change in behavior! Forget all those people who say food only serves as fuel! Someone needs to serve them up a big bowl of mac n cheese after being out in two feet of snow all day! Lol

  30. oh girl you just made my day! I was in NEED of someone to remind me I am human and I make mistakes, and that it is OKAY! Sometimes we forget that there are times we do have a little too much of something but guilt should not be a feeling that we are left with. When I feel guilt over having too much of a good food , it only stresses me more. In my past I’ve restricted myself from so many foods. It was ridiculous. Enjoying the foods you eat is important and it’s okay to have all different kinds of foods in moderation. Before I started my own little journey of intuitive eating, I could honestly say that I found myself not enjoying a lot of foods because I was MAKING myself enjoy them. That’s not how food should be!

    • kissmybroccoli says:

      You are absolutely right, Ashley! Life it too short for guilt and too short for unsatisfying food! So glad to hear the strides you’ve made in your journey!

  31. *clap *clap *clap! High five girl! Thanks for making me feel better about myself! πŸ™‚
    I can totally relate!

    • kissmybroccoli says:

      Awwww! No Jan, THANK YOU!! This right here is WHY I wanted to publish this post…even without having all the answers…and to show just how NOT PERFECT I am! It’s all about the process! Baby steps…you wouldn’t make a child feel bad for falling after just learning to walk would you? πŸ˜‰

  32. I loved this post, sweet friend. My ‘bad’ foods are definitely sugary treats – it’s definitely like a drug to me so I don’t eat it all the time. White, powdery, addictive cocai… I mean sugar. Haha. I “can’t” just have one bite – I legit turn into the Cookie Monster. But, that’s not to say I don’t enjoy a good dessert – I just can’t make it a daily thing otherwise I start physically/psychologically craving sugar ALL THE TIME. But, thats not to say I don’t enjoy a good dessert now & then. My husband & I have a ‘rule’ that if we’re going to eat dessert, we’re going to make it worth our while & get what we “REALLY” want, and sometimes we’ll walk to get it. Haha. Does that sound crazy?

    I also have a REALLY hard time controlling myself around nut butters, but that’s about it. Sometimes I feel guilty for eating 800 spoonfuls from the jar – I stopped buying Sunbutter for that reason (maybe it was the sugar in it?!).

    • kissmybroccoli says:

      Hahaha! Love you girl! Totally “cracking” up right now over your sugar joke! But I get what you mean about it becoming a habit and craving it all the time…that’s why I try to space out my treats and enjoy them at different times of the day…so it doesn’t turn into a knee-jerk reaction…Ok, I’m done with dinner, time for dessert! πŸ˜‰ And please, that makes COMPLETE sense…walking to get a “treat” only makes it feel that much more rewarding…it’s like you physically earned it! Lol

  33. Emily says:

    Yes! I couldn’t have said it better myself (and obviously couldn’t have had such pretty food-pictures to go along with it…)
    You’ve come such a long way and I’m beyond proud of your journey thus far. I think anyone who has ever restricted a product goes through the stage of over-indulging as soon as it’s re-introduced. Deprivation does crazy things to a person! But, eventually we move past the obsession and realize that it will always be there. Things get so much easier when we stop putting food on a pedestal and just enjoy it for what it is. (:

    • kissmybroccoli says:

      Thank you so much, Emily! And yes, it’s UNBELIEVABLE what deprivation can do to us…like we put ourselves in a state of starvation! Our bodies don’t (and can’t) know that we are going to have that item again, so naturally we want to eat it ALL!

  34. Steph says:

    Thank you so much for posting this! I really admire your honesty and openness – you’re so easily relatable, and your attitude is AWESOME and inspiring!

    I’m a restrictive eater with far too many arbitrary “food rules”, and I can definitely relate to feeling guilty for eating certain things. My goal over the past few months has been to try and break these rules and step outside of my comfort zone, and how deeply ingrained these behaviours are has been both a strange and saddening realization. Guilt over what we eat seems to be so culturally acceptable nowadays – but there is definitely so much more to life beyond assigning moral value to things like broccoli and cookies. πŸ˜€

    • kissmybroccoli says:

      “Guilt over what we eat seems to be so culturally acceptable nowadays” <- Oh my gosh, YES!!! I was JUST saying this to myself the other day! Even people who have never dieted or had an unhealthy relationship with food will feel guilt over eating something they feel is a "treat"...all because of how the media and today's society as a whole views food/nutrition! And they only serve to fuel the guilt more by dangling messages of perfection in front of our faces with magazines, billboards, and commercials showing people with "perfect" bodies making "perfect" choices!! And you hit the nail on the head...there is SO much more to life than holding our food to moral standards! Omg, I hope this isn't too forward of me, but I think I love you! πŸ˜‰

      • Steph says:

        Not too forward at all; I think I definitely love both you and everything you’ve said here! πŸ˜‰

        Food and eating should be an experience to enjoy and then move on from, not an unhealthy obsession – and the guilt thing makes that extremely difficult. I hope that eventually society moves away from “eating rules” and into a comfortable, all-encompassing relationship with foods, that takes into account both the physical and emotional needs involved in eating. No one person’s needs are the same, and even those will change day to day for any individual. Being able to tune in and respond to these needs is a great way to care for oneself! Anyways, I’ll stop rambling now! πŸ˜€

        • kissmybroccoli says:

          Whew! So glad the feelings are mutual…I was starting to get sweaty palms! πŸ˜‰

          And please, you are SO not rambling! I agree 100% with what you’re saying here…I really hope we can see these changes take place too, before it’s too late and all the younger generations are jaded! And seriously, the world today needs to take a step back and realize that we can’t all be shoved into these tight-fitting molds…too much perfection, not enough individuality!

          *steps off soapbox*

  35. I can’t control myself around granola, flavoured almonds, trail mix… basically anything snacky! But I love the message of this post – feeling guilty about food is just not worth it. I used to feel super guilty whenever I felt like I overate, but as I was reading this post, I realized I haven’t felt that way in months! I’ve just learned there are so many more important things to focus on.

  36. Anie says:

    “Bury your nose so deep in that rose you end up snorting a ladybug!” – Wow, you just brightened my already amazing day πŸ™‚ Too, too funny!

  37. I SO NEEDED THIS POST TODAY! I had frozen yogurt last night & went to bed SO angry at myself. I felt guilty–the calories, the sugar.. yada yada. I woke up today and STILL felt “gross.” This post was perfect. I do need to remind myself that I am human. I also need to tell myself it is OKAY to have a treat. It is not the end of the world.

    WE ARE BEAUTIFUL WOMEN, HEATHER! πŸ™‚ life is too short. love ya, friend!

    • kissmybroccoli says:

      Aww, honey, I’m so glad that it helped! And just think of it this way…instead of terms of WHAT was in that yogurt, focus on HOW it made you feel. Perhaps next time, you would be more satisfied with a smaller amount…or maybe a completely different treat altogether! And I’d be willing to guess that the next day, you craved more veggies/simple foods too, huh? The body’s natural way of restoring balance is all too awesome! πŸ˜€

  38. I LOVE that you are finding your way!!!! I got fat on sweets & a crackerholic type person so….

    I really do not bring crackers & granola & stuff like that in the house. I may have it at a party in portion control but in the house is just not good for me & I understand & accept that… a little leads to more with some of this.. I tired to keep that healthy Kashi high protein cereal & granola cereal in the house for a bit & it just did not work for me.. That is what is great about this – we all find our won way! πŸ™‚

    • kissmybroccoli says:

      Exactly…it’s all about what works best for YOU! I have realized too that there is a difference between denying myself a craving versus not keeping something around that will CREATE a craving! For instance, I normally don’t even think about having flavored nut mixes, but the minute I have them in the house, it’s all I want! And there’s no sense in making things hard on myself for no good reason!

  39. Lizzi says:

    I still experience this with some foods (cereal, nut butter, granola, cookies, chocolate, cake, crackers, chips, nuts…) and it’s a really hard cycle to break. Other than cutting them out of your life completely (which is no way to live when you love them!), it’s a difficult thing to manage. I’m such an all-or-nothing person, that I tend to think that I either cannot TOUCH a crumb of those foods, or – as you said – it’s game on and I ‘might as well’ just eat the whole packet/jar/whatever because I’m already on that slippery slope and at least that way it’ll be GONE!

    But like anything, it’s a skill that requires practice, and it DOES get easier! Everyone told me this, but I didn’t believe it was possible. But day by day, I ‘practiced’ eating these scary foods. Sometimes I don’t get it right and read a bit more than I really should, sometimes I freak out a little and eat less than I could’ve, just cos I didn’t trust myself enough, and am left wishing I’d had more… AKA eat in a hit-and-miss, imperfect sort of way, AKA like a normal human being πŸ˜‰

    Turning point for me was making a peanut butter sandwich, and a) licking the knife without it resulting in me diving headfirst into the jar, and b) realising I’d actually put a bit more peanut butter on my sandwich than I really wanted, and just taking a little off. In the past, it was such a forbidden food that I would’ve dominated that and thought it tasted awesome, even though logically it wasn’t REALLY what I wanted.

    ANYWAY, my point is… you rule, and this is a hard thing that you’re doing. But keep at it and watch it get simpler and simpler in front of your eyes, until you eventually can’t believe it was even something you had to think about and be mindful of! πŸ™‚

    • kissmybroccoli says:

      Thank you Lizzi!! Ugh, I can’t wait for the day when I can look back on all of this and wonder why it seemed so hard at the time. To eat like a “normal” human being! Ahhh!

      And I TOTALLY get what you mean about the peanut butter sandwich…both with the licking the knife AND with skimming some off. Sometimes when I take something off/away from my meal because I don’t want it, I really have to stop and question myself because for so long, I would take things off/away because I felt I didn’t NEED it! Ya know what I mean?

  40. Kim says:

    bad foods? well I have many of them .. I’m a gastric bypass patient. I found out I can not eat nuts… or alot of sugery foods… I really try to keep to a healthy diet. If I do eat foods I’m not supposed to eat I have intense pain throughout my back… it’s not the “dumping” that most people have but enough to make me not want to feel that way again.

    • kissmybroccoli says:

      Oh honey, I imagine that can make things tough for you! It’s hard to go without certain foods because our bodies can’t handle them versus it just being our minds that take the toll. But in the end, it’s all about doing what’s best for ourselves…what makes us feel good…and what brings us joy without pain…whether physical or mental! *hugs*

  41. Jamie says:

    Lately, I’m constantly running to the refrigerator for carrots dipped in sunflower seed butter. And I have no control whenever there’s a jar of peanut butter around. Or any kind of nut butter. Or seed butter. And I also have some TJ’s cookie butter that I can’t stay away from.. Are we seeing a pattern here? πŸ˜‰

    But those pretzels sound amazing.. I must find some!

    • kissmybroccoli says:

      Haha! I could have written the exact same thing, sweetie! Just try to think of a second…WHY do you keep going back…why you feel you have no “control”? Is it because you see it as a treat that won’t always be there (something that you normally try to limit/restrict)? Also try to stay in tune with HOW those bites make you feel. Being more conscious of that will help it to be more satisfying and you might see that over time you are able to walk away after just ONE bite! πŸ˜€

  42. This post has SO much truth in it. I think it is often times simply about taking food off a pedestal and just plain not thinking about it so darn much.

  43. Seriously.. can we get together and chat soon??? πŸ™‚ I don’t have “bad foods”, I just over eat. I eat when I’m stressed, bored, or just because I want to. πŸ™‚ Then, I feel guilty. I try to eat intuitively, but I have a hard time not eating at certain times. Ya know?

  44. LOVE you. You know my thoughts. Nut butter and granola…and sometimes healthy things like GRAPES. That’s the weirdest. GOOD for me foods become GUILTY.

    • kissmybroccoli says:

      Love you more sweetheart! And don’t worry, I’ve done the same thing with carrots…and watermelon…and pineapple! πŸ˜‰

  45. Bryn says:

    Hi Heather! Love love love your blog…so fun and (this may be weird) but it sounds like you are typing the thoughts in my head sometimes!
    I had a baby 1 year ago, and have been trying to find the healthy balance between working, mommy-ing, wife-ing, and working out/taking time for me. Your “Intuitive Eating” spoke to my frustrations…I do SOOOOO good during the week (bring my own breakfast/lunch to work, count calories, work out at lunch) then on the weekends…boom…bottom out.
    I like Jillian Michael’s philosophy of the 80/20 rule: be good to yourself/eat right 80% of the time, and 20% indulge on your favorite-but-not-so-great-for-you stuff.
    I let myself have a “day off” every Sunday. I don’t go to the gym, I don’t count calories, and I don’t worry about that extra muffin at breakfast or glass of wine at night. It’s hard, but you’re right…we have to give ourselves a BREAK!
    Thanks for your blog! Keep it up!

    • kissmybroccoli says:

      Awww, thank you so much Bryn!! I’m so glad you commented! And seriously, it doesn’t sound weird at all…I thought I was a little weird for having some of these thoughts until I put them out there and realized that a LOT of people have the same issues! I hope you continue to strive for that balance in life…I can imagine it being even harder with being a new mommy, but just remember you can’t take care of someone else unless you take care of YOURSELF first! We can only deny our needs for so long before they come back to bite us!


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